If we were having coffee I’d probably want to tell you about many things but actually just babble a lot of nonsense. I’d tell you that I am proud that I stopped wearing all black every day and started to have enough white clothes for a washing load once a week. I’d talk about yesterday’s workout and that my body is aching but not about how I love knitting lately because I think it’s embarrassing. I’d tell you how I like the interior design and that I am eagerly waiting to be able to afford my own flat or house one day just to decorate it all by myself. But I wouldn’t tell you that I’d love to have a room for Yoga, stretching and gymnastics; mentioning Yoga tends to irritate people like the word vegan.
If we’re having coffee I’d like to sit down and enjoy the coffee, maybe a tea afterwards. I might be too insecure to tell you that I’d like to just sit there, that I don’t want to get up and leave straight away after I’ve finished my drink. Sometimes I overthink situations – if you look at your watch often I’d get nervous and think you’re bored and you’d want to leave. I might explain to you why I feel uncomfortable around watches and clocks. They make me nervous. Maybe I’d tell you how I was so irritated by a watch during a church lesson once, that I hid the batteries in the break. I don’t know why we keep wearing watches around our wrists – even on holiday. It’s like they’re our machine to keep us going, our drive – Tik Tok.
If we were having coffee I might reach for the new women’s health in my bag, show you an article I liked and read it out loud no matter if you’re interested or not. While I was searching for the page, you could’ve spotted some bullet points I wrote down with a weak pencil. You might ask me about it and I’d tell you those were notes of the stretching and warming up exercises I learned in the hand balancing class from Nikita Sukhanov. The magazine was the first piece of paper I found when I thought of writing down the exercises. Whenever you think – I don’t need to write it down, I’ll remember it – write it down, you will not remember it.
If we were having coffee I’d tell you that I was invited to a wedding in Scotland. I’ve never been to a wedding and have no idea what I should be wearing or what’s expecting me. I’d hope you could tell me about your experiences and maybe we would start a debate about marriage. I might tell you that I don’t get it, that I wouldn’t want to spend a ridiculous amount of money on one day; that I wouldn’t invite people just because they “should be invited”.
I like asking people where they see themselves in 10 years and I often get the answer: married (among other things). But I don’t believe marriage should be seen as a personal milestone in life. Marriage does not seem like an achievement to me – personal development and developing skills does; moving into another city/country, falling in love and finding your passion does.
If we were having coffee you’ll realise that I’m not interested in small talk. I love having a conversation and explore different topics, use the whole range. In my opinion, we can learn a lot just by listening to other peoples stories; if we were having coffee I’d hope we’re not just waiting for our turn to talk but actually listen; let the words create a picture in your head. Some coffee dates can feel like travelling at times. You’re taken on a journey, can look through somebody else’s eyes and visit places, get in touch with emotions simply by concentrating on your accompaniments words.
If we’ve had coffee I’d hope that you enjoyed spending time with me.